The NHS should monitor their hospital waiting rooms,
To make sure the books of the shelves are right.
When I was there, I was shocked to see,
Some books that gave me a fright.

When I was visiting a relative,
I was asked to wait while the doctor finished a round.
I looked at the books the ward staff had curated,
I couldn’t believe my eyes, and I frowned.

Who on earth would put The Big Sleep on the shelf,
Gone with the Wind and For Whom the Bell Tolls?
And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie.
They’ve given no thought to us poor souls.

On the shelf below was Appointment with Death,
And next to it The Woman in White.
I was totally shocked to see Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn,
And I knew something wasn’t at all right.

To my amazement the bottom shelf was worst of all.
Orwell’s Coming Up for Air and Howards End I could spy.
Death in the Afternoon by Ernest Hemmingway,
Was flanked by James Bond in Live and Let Die.

I carefully removed all these unsuitable books,
And I piled them in a corner.
Later I found The Razor’s Edge by Somerset Maugham.
Very clearly this was out of order.

So, to all you hospital administrators,
Please keep a careful watch on your books,
So, you don’t frighten to death the relatives,
Because at the moment that’s just how it looks.