How the hell can you laugh your socks off?
Everyone knows money doesn’t grow on trees.
Who on earth would pack the kitchen sink?
I don’t want to look like the bees’ knees.

If I was all ears I’d look like a taxi with open doors.
Not even Nigella Lawson can whip up a storm.
I struggle going the first mile never mind an extra one.
Laughing on the other side of your face is not a trick to perform.

I won’t regret it in the morning, if I sleep till noon.
How do mice have best laid plans, like men?
Why would you want to laugh up your sleeve?
I only once let a cat out of a bag, never again.

Have you ever jumped on a bandwagon?
I fear I’d rather easily fall off.
Bending over backwards would bring the same result,
And any friends watching would simply scoff.

When I’ve been tickled I‘ve never turned pink.
If I pulled someone’s leg they’d give me a welly.
I’ve never thought about biting any dust.
I cry over spilled only when it turns smelly.