They are drapes over there but here they’re curtains.
They call it a truck but the proper name is a lorry.
They say sidewalk while we say pavement.
They say excuse me while we say sorry.

They call them chips but really they’re crisps.
The Yanks call it an elevator but to us it’s a lift.
When they say jelly instead of strawberry jam,
That’s when I really get miffed.

They snack on cookies while we munch on bickies.
They call it a diaper while we say it’s a nappy.
They say it’s a hood but to us it’s the bonnet.
When they call the boot the trunk I’m very unhappy.

The Yanks say it’s the fall when really it’s just autumn.
They have a vacation while we enjoy a holiday.
They say it’s gas while we say it’s just petrol.
We ask ‘Please put your hands up’, they say ‘Make my day’.

Is it period or full stop, restroom or toilet?
Eggplant or aubergine, sweets or candy?
Flashlight or torch, sneakers or trainers?
I think a glossary of terms would come in handy.