If Darwin was right and I came crawling from the mud,
I hope I was an angel fish rather than a rudd.
If my homo-erectus self was indeed at one stage a monkey,
I’m sure I was an orangutang, tall and quite chunky.
If my neanderthal ancestor had begun to stand up tall,
As soon as it was invented I know I’d have kicked a ball.
If my homo-sapien self had the brain the size of a pea,
I’m sure I made the most of it and got myself a degree.
If my great, great granddad had been a politician,
I know I’d have a much more troubled disposition.