It’s not a giant leap from ‘That’ll come in handy’ to being a hoarder.
I’ve an attic full of rubbish and a shed that’s fit to burst.
Every single time I say, ‘I know it’s in here somewhere.’
I’m pretty sure it’s hoarder’s syndrome and I’m cursed?

I’ve got loads of cupboard handles and sandpaper that’s been used,
Millions of screws and nuts and bolts and just as many nails.
I’ve got Allen Keys galore and some old car headlight bulbs,
Slivers of wood for stirring paint and even a boat’s sails.

Spare tiles for walls that were tiled long ago,
Tins of paint that’s have gone rock hard,
Footy programmes and a box of dinky cars.
Although we only have radiators, I’ve even got a fire guard.

Old number plates and knitting needles,
A broken workmate and three core cable,
Rusty old hinges, loads of old Newspapers,
Broken garden chairs and a plastic table.

I can’t keep holding on to stuff ‘just in case’.
It’s getting too far much. I can’t get in the garage at all.
The shelves in there are bowing under the strain.
Not room at all for a car as the junk is wall to wall.