I’m warning you; you’re pushing your luck.
My Dad’s bigger than your Dad.
If you shout at me like that again,
He’ll come to your house and he’ll be mad.

Well, my Mum’s bigger than your Dad.
She’ll punch him on the nose when he comes.
If he’s still standing up after that,
She’ll kick him up the bum.

I’ll get my big brother on to you.
He’s in a boxing club you know.
He’s big and hard and has all the moves.
He’ll floor you with just one blow.

I’m faster than your big brother.
He couldn’t catch me if he tried.
I’d be up, on me toes and away,
Before he was even outside.

My Uncle’s an athlete; he can outrun you.
He races in a running club.
He’ll chase you, catch you and beat you up.
Then him and me will have a pint in the pub.

I’m the best there is at hiding.
You wouldn’t find me to beat me up.
I’d be hiding somewhere watching you.
You wouldn’t even see me if you were close up.

Our dog’s the best at finding things.
He’d sniff you out in no time.
He’d bark and tell us where you were.
Then he’d dribble on you with his slime.

Did you hear that? Our mums are calling us in.
Shall we play out after our tea?
I fancy going into the woods.
You can help me climb that tree.