This damned autocorrect gets me in all sorts of trouble.
Especially when it changes text to ‘Can I have a double’.

It wrote, ‘Great news, Grandma is homosexual’.
Instead of ‘Grandma is coming home from hospital’.

It changed ‘Hello Frank’ to ‘Hell Frank’ and caused alarm.
One of these days Frank is going to do me some serious harm.

I sign off as ‘Yours Eric’ but autocorrect changes it to ‘Father Epic’.
People think I’m an arrogant devil or even some sort of cleric.